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Sep. 5th, 2003 06:36 pm1)I found a part time job. my duties include a) ripping apart cardboard boxes with my bare hands (excellent excersize for the fingers) and b) finding new and unique ways to say "I don't know and can't be fucked to find out" to customers. i perform these tasks with usual hyperefficiency and so the coworkers have been deluded into thinking i'm a hard worker. if they only new. i hold myself back from everything if you've ever noticed, it's a small part of my charm and a large part of me being an asshole. You wont realize that i'm an asshole for a while, though. I'll probably be smiling.
2) dr pepper has the most interesting knockoffs. this one is called "dr Bob" and the tagline is "Open Wide, Say Ahhh!" I'm so ghetto.
3)working is, in effect, selling your time away. so's shewl, really. but one gets you money and the other gets you a piece of paper. But. 30 hours a week doesn't seem like much at first, but then you realize the hidden charges. the prep time, the tiredness, the stray thoughts, then it starts creeping into your dreams and then, really, how many hours a week are you not thinking about work? soon it even creeps into your livejournal. well i swear that won't happen. it will take nerves of steel and a mental gnosis of 5=6degree in the Ordo Templi Orientis to manage, but i wont let that happen. nope. yep. nope.
4)ive been trying to put together a short compilation of peoms to enter into contests but picking things is very difficult. a lot of the things i have i like but they feel.. like peices of something larger, something inchoate. so i shouldnt use them. or, title them all as fragments. so i'm seeing if i can tie a few shorter pieces into roethke-ish serieses (i know roethke influenced sylvia's poem for a birthday, he's allowed to influence me too). a combination of exhaustion and overanalyzation has damaged my brain, now i read everything not as words or even emotions, I see lines and angles, geometrics, symbologistics. i can't tell what's good, i can only see parallel structures and internal assonances and leitmotifs. one day you'll open a book of mine and it will just be a jumble of twisted girders lying in heaps, connecting to each other at impossible angles, a four dimensional mass creating a hole or a tower or whats the difference.
5)I'm also using Dr. Bob and sarcasm to hide the fact that I'm sad right now. See how I hold myself back? And dont bother asking if anything's wrong I'll just make a joke and brush it off.
2) dr pepper has the most interesting knockoffs. this one is called "dr Bob" and the tagline is "Open Wide, Say Ahhh!" I'm so ghetto.
3)working is, in effect, selling your time away. so's shewl, really. but one gets you money and the other gets you a piece of paper. But. 30 hours a week doesn't seem like much at first, but then you realize the hidden charges. the prep time, the tiredness, the stray thoughts, then it starts creeping into your dreams and then, really, how many hours a week are you not thinking about work? soon it even creeps into your livejournal. well i swear that won't happen. it will take nerves of steel and a mental gnosis of 5=6degree in the Ordo Templi Orientis to manage, but i wont let that happen. nope. yep. nope.
4)ive been trying to put together a short compilation of peoms to enter into contests but picking things is very difficult. a lot of the things i have i like but they feel.. like peices of something larger, something inchoate. so i shouldnt use them. or, title them all as fragments. so i'm seeing if i can tie a few shorter pieces into roethke-ish serieses (i know roethke influenced sylvia's poem for a birthday, he's allowed to influence me too). a combination of exhaustion and overanalyzation has damaged my brain, now i read everything not as words or even emotions, I see lines and angles, geometrics, symbologistics. i can't tell what's good, i can only see parallel structures and internal assonances and leitmotifs. one day you'll open a book of mine and it will just be a jumble of twisted girders lying in heaps, connecting to each other at impossible angles, a four dimensional mass creating a hole or a tower or whats the difference.
5)I'm also using Dr. Bob and sarcasm to hide the fact that I'm sad right now. See how I hold myself back? And dont bother asking if anything's wrong I'll just make a joke and brush it off.
